batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
