So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Pińatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize