Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
