You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
