I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
