we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
