Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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