Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You ate ashes out of my bong
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
