dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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