You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
