Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
