the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Randomize