I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
FUCK WHALES
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
