this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
