Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
