who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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