And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize