Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize