we have pet lesbian snakes
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
