and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
