This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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