Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Help me help you realize you are a moron
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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