I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
