he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
