Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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