ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Randomize
