She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
