What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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