i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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