He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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