She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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