He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
