guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
