He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
