It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Randomize
