Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
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