I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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