i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
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