Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
A bitchslap is in order.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
