in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
