My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
