it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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