I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
