if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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