I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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