I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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