I'm lost and stupid without you.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I love you. Go after that dick
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
