how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
