I'm gonna have a badass scar
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize