I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
