i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
